Ellen Langer’s recipe for a happy life.

GLADO (generous, loving, authentic, direct, open)

Facts are just other people’s views.

It’s hard to go forward when looking back.

If he did it, it must have made sense to him.
(If you want to change behavior, you need to understand why they do it)

Life would be dull if it all made sense.

If you like yourself, it’s easier to be yourself.

Being a free spirit is worth the cost.

The mosre we love, the more we feel loved.

Expecting change brings stability. (The only thing we can count on is change)

If we take ourselves too seriously, no one else will.

Is it a tragedy or an inconvenience?

Distracted or otherwise attracted?

Find the novel in the familiar.

Ask a better question to get a better answer. (YOU change the question. Answer what YOU want)

If we don’t try to control, we don’t risk losing control.

How we feel is a matter of choice.

Predict today and lose tomorrow.

Understanding is better than forgiving. (If I lie to you and you catch me, I could have enough self respect to say “I lied to you because I didn’t think you could handle the truth”

A rose is not a rose is not a rose. (Everything keeps changing)

Envy leaves when learning arrives.

Today’s embarrassment is tomorrow’s fun story.

Be positively negative, say no with a smile.

What is was once a decision.

Passivity robs us of ourselves.

Choice requires doubt.

There’s always a small enough step we can take towards our goal.

If we don’t take the compliment, we’re not vulnerable to the insult.

A centered self is not self-centered. (We shouldn’t spend all this time evaluating ourselves)

Keep fixing it so it won’t break.

Doing nothing is doing something.

Only if we blame is there reason to forgive.

We love those who let us see them.

Solitaire is a state of mind. (You can be lonely with people and be at the top of your game alone)

We can either be imperfectly mindful or perfectly mindless.

Mistakes are made slowly as often as in haste.

Lazy is just insufficiently motivated.

Rules are made by rulers.

Take the vertical and make it horizontal.

Don’t see it as positive or negative, just see it.

Be responsive not reactive.

To feel expansive, risk being wrong.

It’s hard to be soft. (Be a man)

Think without the box. (We say ‘think outside the box’…who put the damn box there in the first place?!)

Accepting our shortcomings impedes growth.

Fight fire with water. (Kill them with kindness)

Evaluative comparisons are mindless.

Mastering is more fun than having mastered.

Instead of why ask why not.

No worry before it’s time.

Life consists only of moments. (Take care of this moment, then the next, then the next…)

AND not OR.

Compromise means everyone loses. (Find a win-win!)

Don’t worry about making the right decision, make the decision right.

Different is interesting.

If anyone can do it, everyone can do it (just maybe not the same way).

Where we are is where we’ve never been.

Almost counts. (“Almost” doesn’t count)

We can find it irritating or see its charm.

We have to take to give the joy of giving. (When we let people give to us, they experience joy)

If we befriend our enemies all we will have is friends.